When I was pregnant with our first son Zakary, I didn't really give 'giving birth' a second thought if I'm honest. Lets be fair, its got to come out somehow and to me the obvious way was naturally. I knew a fair few people who had given birth and they were alright, to me I would be too. I didn't want an epidural and I was going to go as natural as possible. I booked myself in with the local birthing centre and decided on a water birth. 6 days before my due date I went into labour (on April Fools would you believe it!) I laboured fairly well, it was painful yes, but bearable and after around 20 hours of contractions my waters went and I started pushing. This is where it all went downhill; I pushed for 2.5 hours!!!! To cut (excuse the pun) a long story short I ended up with an extended episiotomy and a tear, 3rd degree to be exact - OUCH! I was transferred to the nearest main hospital where I was administered a spinal and I was stitched up in theatre by a lovely lady doctor. I was discharged the next day with a bag full of antibiotics, laxatives and pain killers; my introduction to motherhood was oh so glamorous!!
Three years later we had decided it was time to add another addition to the clan, I fell pregnant fairly quickly and I was automatically assigned to a consultant due to my previous tear. Up until this point id really not thought much about my previous birth experience, I honestly did not think it had had a lasting effect on me. I WAS WRONG (not something I admit lightly). I found myself sat in front of a middle aged lady consultant sobbing my heart out when she stated very matter of a fact'ly, "there's no reason you can't have a natural birth again, you have no ongoing issues, we'll see you again when you're in labour". She showed no signs of concern for me and sent me on my way fairly quickly.
It was then I decided I couldn't do it again, I was scared, no, I was terrified of tearing again.
She couldn't guarantee me that another natural birth would be straightforward or more importantly it wouldn't have more lasting damage to my already once repaired pelvic floor. I went back to my midwife and said I wanted to change hospitals, and I wanted a new consultant. Luckily for me I didn't have to fight to hard at all, my new consultant and hospital were very understanding of how I felt, they gave me all the information and statistics on both C-sections and the chances of having another serious tear. I opted for the C-section.
My C-section was scheduled for 39+2 and went very well, we were blessed with another big boy 8lbs 7oz with a large head (it was then I was told I had actually made a wise decision in going for c-section) and I was discharged 2 days later. Yes it was painful, laughing was horrendous and I swear I almost killed my cat when she jumped on my wound at 4 days post partum! Jeezzus fecking christ that hurt. I couldn't push my pram, I couldn't pick my 4 year old to cuddle him, I could barely sit up if I was led it bed - it hurt, ALOT. If I'm honest it hurt more than I thought it would, but keeping on top of my meds it was ok. Having said this, I could sit down comfortably, I could go to the loo without fearing my insides would fall out (anyone who's had a baby knows what I mean) AND most importantly to me, I felt relieved that I had potentially saved myself from future continence issues which had been my main concern when opting for a section.
So the next time you hear someone make a comment on a woman opting for a C-section think carefully about why they're doing it. I can almost guarantee you it won't be because its the easy way out. Most probably its because she either a) had a section the first time or b) she had a horrific delivery the first time and quite frankly she doesn't fancy spending the rest of her life using tenna ladys....
I know what I'd prefer.
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